The Importance of the Decision to Divorce

“Thanks Mom & Dad – You Just Ruined My Life.” Would you rather: hear that sentence and know it is false? Or never hear that sentence, yet know it is true? That is a choice parents face all the time. Whether it comes to allowing kids to attend certain parties or concerts, paying more forContinue reading “The Importance of the Decision to Divorce”

The Desert Island Theory

Remember the old game, “If you were stranded on a desert island and could only bring one album* what would it be?” (* or DVD, or CD, or book, or movie, or friend…) The first question, of course, is if you were stranded on a desert island, how did you have time to pack thatContinue reading “The Desert Island Theory”

How Being a Taker Plays Out in Divorce

You know these people – the ones who weigh every relationship, every opportunity, as an opportunity to “get” more.  We’ll call them the Takersons.  A Takerson has two friends, one owns a boat; the other does not.  One Saturday evening the Takersons have dinner plans with their non-boat friends.   Everyone has hired babysitters, arranged theirContinue reading “How Being a Taker Plays Out in Divorce”

The Cost of Divorce

“How long will this take, and how much is it going to cost me?” This is a question divorce attorneys frequently hear from their clients.  Sometimes it is a question regarding an aspect of the divorce – such as a custody modification, or the entire divorce.  It is an interesting question. First, there are someContinue reading “The Cost of Divorce”

It’s always wise to offer kindness

I am inspired by one of the couples I am divorcing in July.  This is what they have:  debts, a looming foreclosure, potential bankruptcy, 1 working vehicle (unregistered), 3 surviving parents (none of whom are helpful), one angry sister-in-law, 2 known affairs, raging alcoholism, and two young children. Only one spouse is capable of earning aContinue reading “It’s always wise to offer kindness”

The light at the end of the tunnel..

Two old friends, Jane & Susan, run into each other for the first time in years.  Jane: Sue, you look fantastic! What’s your secret? Susan: I lost 200 pounds of unwanted dead weight. Jane: how? Susan: I got a divorce! …… This is what criminal attorneys say about divorce: “In criminal law we represent someContinue reading “The light at the end of the tunnel..”

Bling in Your Face..

What brings divorced people back to a lawyer’s office, or the courthouse?  Usually, a “significant change in circumstances,” or at least the perception of a change in circumstances. Most states have a rule that child support (and sometimes alimony) can be changed after the divorce is final, but only if one spouse’s circumstances change inContinue reading “Bling in Your Face..”

No Major Decisions by Text

The digital age of divorce has its benefits.  My clients and I can keep in touch with each other 24/7 via text and email. We used to reserve most of our communications for business hours, and only those hours when I was not in court or meeting with someone else. They all had my homeContinue reading “No Major Decisions by Text”

Ease your way into things..

A man once had a cat that he loved very much.  When he went away for a six-month work assignment, he left the cat in the care of his brother, promising to call every week and check on the status of his beloved cat. All went well, until one week when the man called andContinue reading “Ease your way into things..”

Keep your eyes on the road ahead..

What divorce does (and does not) solve Well, the truth is, it only solves a few specific things.  Divorce does not make you more (or less) organized, motivated, sober (or carefree), responsible or irresponsible.  It might, for a while, increase or alleviate a few of those traits.  For example, if you are an ordinarily organizedContinue reading “Keep your eyes on the road ahead..”