Moore and Kutcher: the breaking of a pre nup

Ashton Kutcher at the Huffington Post Pre-Inau...
Image via Wikipedia

Despite his forays into the twitterverse, apparently Ashton Kutcher forgot to read my tweet (@luvyrdivorce) about Eva Longoria from last spring… when Eva Longoria tried to avoid her own pre-nuptial agreement.

To wit:  Pre nuptial agreements are frequently used in marriages when the parties want a clean record of who brought what to the marriage and what each party may expect to keep at the end of the marriage.  Apparently, Longoria’s prenup with Tony Parker included a clause that she would not seek  alimony if they were to divorce.  By avoiding her pre-nup, Longoria ran the risk of exposing her own assets to redistribution…the move goes to a deeper understanding of the motivations of divorcing parties.

No matter what causes a marriage to break down and no matter how many years the breakdown may take, once a married or divorcing party becomes romantically involved outside the marriage, all other bets are off.  This tends to enrage the forsaken spouse and otherwise amicable divorces quickly become unbalanced blood baths.

Demi Moore in profile at the 1997 Emmy Awards,...
Image via Wikipedia

Demi Moore had a successful career (she was the first actress to reach the $10 million salary mark, and during the early 1990s she was the highest paid actress in Hollywood), a successful divorce from Bruce Willis (with 3 beautiful daughters they still co-parent), and a substantial bank account when she married Kutcher (16 years her junior) 6 years ago.   She was smart to protect herself by insisting on a prenuptial agreement.

Now, by trying to open their pre nup, she runs the risk of her own assets being attacked.  Yet, it is worth it to her to begin a fight with Kutcher over assets as a way of punishing him for his reported infidelities.  Nothing hurts a potentially friendly divorce as badly as one (or several) extra marital affair(s).

As I repeatedly advise my clients: wait until your own divorce is final before you become romantically (or sexually) involved with someone new.  Your true person will still be there at the end of the process and you may save yourself years of aggravation and thousands of dollars by ending one relationship before beginning the next.  (Or, in the case of Kutcher and Moore, hundreds of thousands of dollars.)

What We Love:  Patience.  Divorce does not last forever. But an angry spouse can make it feel like forever.

Published by Sharon Oberst DeFala

Sharon Oberst DeFala has practiced low-impact safe divorce since 1992.

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