Post divorce Eva Longoria is appearing on TV talk shows with David Letterman, Piers Morgan and Rachael Ray as well as in magazines like Allure discussing her emotional difficulties and challenges during and since her divorce from Tony Parker.
Is this celebrity gamesmanship, in which she gives herself more emotional damage by re-living the mess? Is she trying to gain public sympathy and thereby somehow harm Parker’s public image? Does sad play better than well-adjusted in TV interviews?
In interview after interview Longoria talks about the difficulty she had in going through her divorce, how much the marriage meant to her and the fact that she is uncomfortable dating. Her life has been turned upside-down, not having Lakers games to attend on a regular basis and needing to re-construct a new life for herself.
All of these are very real challenges that face newly divorced people every day. Post divorce people look around at their lives and see where the holes have been left and wonder how to fill them. While one way might be replacing basketball games with book stores, an important tool available to almost anyone is simply speaking out.
Your friends and family want to know what you are thinking and feeling. It may feel tedious to have to say, “I am sad. I feel alone. I do not want to date again.” But unless you say it, no one knows. If your friends don’t know what hurts they don’t know how to help in whatever small (or large) ways they can.
Longoria is doing what might be the healthiest thing she could be doing right now – letting those who care about her know what she feels. People who think she should get over it already do not really care about her – no matter what she does. She will get over it when she is ready to move on. And that moment will likely come sooner if she continues to acknowledge whatever feelings are standing between her and her own happiness.
What we love: It is not always easy to let others know your feelings; but it is almost always worth it; especially during one of the most challenging periods in your life.